the bliss of the lord of the universe

listen - too much happens here to actually detail what i have been up to, so bullet lists may soon appear. however, i will do my best to catch up to today - the 6th of march.

i ended last with a bit of suspense, so here is the resolution: ok, so i had a delightful cup of chai and a package of tiger milk biscuits for breakfast, and took a picture of it to remind myself of my last breakfast in ganeshpuri. the chaiwalla told me the best way to get to mumbai (less crowded) and soon thereafter i was off to visit the swami. i sang the whole way up the mountain: gam ganapatie, namo namah - the chant that is played continuously at the temple up there, and when i arrived swami was suprised to see me, but delighted. to me, it seemed like i was going to visit an old friend, there is something very familiar about him. i asked him if it was okay if i called him swamiji (i was having quite a hard time pronouncing his full name - vishveshwaranda) and we sat under the awning where he receives devotees. tuesday i soon learned, was ganesh's day - two female devotees came with fruits and flowers for ganesh. additionally, there was a western female there as well - sangeeve, a devotee of gurumayi. together we all had darshan with swamiji. he talked in english and marathi alternatively, and he spoke of the role of the guru and also of the water shortage. in his presence i felt electrified and his voice was very resonant, and his eyes were sparkling - sangeeve said that his shakti was so strong due to his practice of keeping silent for most of the day. i could only agree. at noon we preformed arati at the ganesh temple, and i accidentally gave all of my prasad to the cows (there were two cows and i got two bananas, so i thought that was what i was supposed to do) and we preformed arati at the other two temples on the hill top - then we all (sangeeve, myself, the two devotees, the ashramites (4 old men) and swamiji) took lunch together in the ashram's main building. this is a very basic structure - brick walls withholes for windows and a palm leaf roof. it was really sweet eating the absolutely delicious food with my fingers, right alongside the indian women (who i have come to absolutely adore!). afterwards, swami beckoned me aside, and told me to come tomorrow, as he would give me private instructions related to my spiritual path. i agreed, glad to have a reason not to leave ganeshpuri, and sangeeve and i walked back to where she was staying. I was introduced to yogini - her host, and mr datta, or simply datta - a delightful man from mauritis (island of the coast of madagascar). the accomodation there was really quite nice, and i actually ended up staying there for the rest of my time in ganeshpuri. we went on an afternoon adventure - datta had to send something by courrier - all the way to vikhar - about an hour + ride from ganeshpuri. yogini is a roboust woman, and cannot walk around very well, so i experienced vegetable shopping from the car - she waved over the veggie sellers to her - they all knew her - to inquire about prices and bargain. i booked a train ticket to chennai so i could make my way to ganeshpuri, and the next available train was on sunday at 8 pm! so i was destined to stay in ganeshpuri through the weekend, which delighted me as i would be able to chant the guru gita again and also have darshan and meditate in baba's mahasamadhi.

the next morning i awoke (5am) in the room i had shared with sangeeve - and she was gone, along with all of her luggage! i was dumbfounded, but continued on with my program (morning asana on the wonderful rooftop - this time facing the moon, as it was setting, then 6 am arati, then meditation in nityananda's sleeping room - a very powerful place). i actually managed to get seva in kailas (what they call nityananda's house) - which is apparently difficult to do - but i just asked and ganapatim (the caretaker?) said ok, and gave me a broom. i lovingly swept the area around nityananda's chair - and beat out the mats that people come and sit on for meditation there. after i finished, i swept out the kitchen area, and then shared prasad - sweet milk with a hint of coffee powder - with ganapatim and nora, a woman from mexico who was doing lots of seva, 'good seva' in kailas (from 7till 11 every morning!). it was wonderful talking with her, but due to sangeeve's strange and unnanounced dissapearance, i hastened to get back to yogini's in case she returned (i had the only key). ganapatim said that i could do seva the rest of the time i was in ganeshpuri - which i delighgfully accepted! - for a few hours every day.

sangeeve had not returned, and yogini seemed to think that she wouldn't, so i headed off to bramhapuri and my meeting with swamiji. i arrived and he was preparing things for a special puja - apparently it was poornima (full moon) - big day for the goddesses. i thought that it was the following day, as that is what my calendar says, but i was mistaken. in any case, i had the most delightful time assisting swamiji in the pooja =- it took about an hour and a half - first lots of chanting, then cleaning this magnificent gold plated pyramid thing (i really should know what it is called, i will find out!) with first water, then milk and ghee, then water, then coconut water, then water, then rosewater, then repainting it with kumkum and throwing lots of flower petals on it - all the while chanting. during this pooja, swamiji dubbed me saraswathy - goddess of learning and knowledge - as he placed the yellow and then red kumkum on my third eye. i haven't mentioned yet - i don't think- but all the indians that i was meeting in ganeshpuri and mumbai could not pronounce luella - so i just started introducing myself as sarah. that is where, i think, swamiji got the saraswathy. swamiji did give me some instructions after the pooja - he gave me three mantras to memorize and gave me a meditation technique - and i stayed for the noon arati. i told him that i was not leaving ganeshpuri until sunday, so i would be back. he asked me if i could cook anything, and i said yes, of course - so he asked me to bring food to cook for tomorrow's meal, which i excitedly agreed to. however, when i got back to yogini's, datta and vinot (another swami (?) i met while meditating in kailas) were there, and over chai i explained my morning. they both immediately warned of potential druggings and the fact that the swami only wanted money from westerners, so i was thrown into a state of conflict. i did go out for evening arati with datta, and i did buy the mungdal and rice to make kitcheri, intending to still go visit swamiji the next day, but the universe had another plan indeed.

i awoke at 4, for the early morning arati, which vinot accompanied me to. vinot was very overprotective, and insisted that he come with me to arati - even though i had been tramping around ganeshpuri in the very early morning by myself for several days now - and proceeded to direct my every move from thereon out. however, once i got into meditation in nityananda's room at kailas i started feeling quite terrible - faint, dizzy, very hot, and constant runny nose. my stomach was also giving me warning signs... and i had a very clear thought come to me - i must take care of my physical body if my spiritual work and progress is to continue. so i left (no seva, which i was dissapointed about, but really felt quite bad and couldn't do it). i went back to yogini's and went back to bed, with the intention that i would wake up in a few hours and go on to cook for swamiji, as at that time is was only 6am. i had crazy dreams (one with lots of snow and ice) and suddenly i was awakened by a loud knocking. i answered the door, and there was vinot, checking on me. on the wall behind him was a clock and it was 5pm! i absoutely could not belive it! i had slept all day long, on thursday, which is guru's day and a special day in ganeshpuri. i did manage to make it down to the village (yogini lives halfway between the nityananda temple and the gurudev siddha peeth ashram) for palike - the procession they do every thursday of a mini statue of nityananda around the town. the whole way people come out with little trays of flowers and coconuts and insence, and have the brahmins preform an arati for them while the whole procession (which i was a part of) waits, continually singing songs to nityananda. however, after only 20 mins or so, i was really feeling faint, and got some water and left the procession. that evening, yogini insisted again that i take milk with ghee and tumeric to help my cold. she really did insist, and i couldn't say no (or it would have offended her) so more things into the system that really did not serve it at all. vinot was administering me warmed honey with ginger, which was helpful, as was a tea made with tulsi and cardamon.
friday, i awoke feeling much better, no more fever, and i practiced yoga on the rooftop with datta (who has his own style). we had a delightful conversation about spiritual progress, and somehow, the time slipped away and i was unable to get up to visit swamiji - i also still didn't feel as if i had the energy to do so. also, datta and vinot's warnings were still fresh in my mind. that afternoon i went with yogini and vinot to a funeral (of sorts). the 13th day after the death is the last day of mourning/celebration, and we were fed delicious food and pretty much just sat out under the awning for a while. then yogini took us to her favorite temple - a jain temple, which was carved most magnificently out of white marble and really quite beautiful. there we had chai and prasad - a sweet, ghee soaked grain with tumeric and cardamon.
the next morning, guru gita (so so sweet!) and then yoga asanas with datta on the rooftop again. i went to the aratis at the nityananda temple, and also sat for meditation in baba's mahasamadhi twice that day (the two times it was open). i was starting to feel really bad about not going up to visit swamiji - i realized i had to trust my own gut feeling rather than trust these eccentric old men - so i vowed to go the next day. i did, bringing the rice and mungdal and vegetables and fruits (for the cows) and when i got up there, it turned out that a family had bought new clothes for the main ganesh statue - so there was a whole crew of people up there and there was an intensive pooja for ganesh. swamiji was happy of course to see me, he did make a little play of being mad at me, but he made hand signs and facial expressions to indicate that it didn't matter. he gave me a little bag of nuts and dried fruits to take with me on my travels, and he said of course "you go tomorrow" while waving his hand, but i insisted that i couldn't change my train, and had to leave that afternoon. a pleasant ending to an amazing visit - he invited me back next year in march when he and three other female devotees from switzerland?sweeden? i can't remmeber, will all be traveling to kerala on a pilgrimage of sorts (that is where he is from originally).

i hired a rickshaw to take me to the train station in vasai - where i got 1st class to dadar (a station in mumbai) where my evening train to chennai left. all uneventful - traveling by train is quite comfortable, as you can lie down whenever you want, or read, or look out the window at the AMAZING countryside - and not too expensive, and they bring you food, or chai or water or juice or biscuits. i saw some amazing rock formations in the center of the country, made me only slightly jealous that i didn't get out of ganeshpuri and go to hampi, which i still could do, if i so desired.

i arrived at night to chennai, the train was late, as usual, and i would not make it to the mother's house before their 10pm curfew. i decided to get a room in a hotel for the night, and come the next day, when suddenly "sarah, sarah!". there was a man, waving a phone at me. he said that he was vinot's brother, and he offered for me to go stay with him in his house - free of charge. i couldn't really belive my luck, and after he pulled out a corded (yes, corded phone like you would have inyour house) and actually used it to call datta, whom i spoke with there in the train station - he said, yes, of course it was alright for me to go with him - makesh - so i did. a 20 min mororbike ride later (me with my way too big pack on my back) through the crazy streets of chennai, we arrived at his house. it was very nice, and he and his son very extremely hospitable and nice. i am pretty sure that they gave me the only bedroom in the house, and in the morning i had breakfast and makesh arranged a ride for me to the bus stop so i could get to pondicherry, where i have a booking at the mother's house for a month. i was really amazed at his generosity and he said if i have any problems at all, to just call him. i spoke with his sister, who lives in an ashram in hardiwar, and she did some translating for me - his wife and daughter were on pilgrimage in delhi to see nityananda - a disciple of baba muktananda's and gurumayi's brother (complicated story here, will not explain) - and she got my breakfast likes and explained to makesh that i wanted to go by bus to pondicherry (i think that vinot had convinced him to take me all around chennai the next day to see temples and what not, which i really did not want to do). so, with the help of his amma (cleaning lady) i made it to the bus stop and got on my bus to pondy (only 65 rupees).

the ride itself took about 4 hrs, but we passed beautiful scenery - we were traveling along the east coast road. i kept seeing all these square cement platforms on the ground, clustered together, and finally it dawned on me that they must be old villages - the tsunami had swept away all the rest of houses. once i realized that, i started to look for more evidence of the tsunami, and there it was - everywhere. the road itself was new, and i saw places where the old road was - all new bridges and lots of strange half structures and low walls with nothing inside. the beach looked like tropical paradise - lots of palm trees, white sand, and sparkling blue water. i was getting very excited for pondicherry, right on the beach.

i finally arrived at the mother's house that afternoon, and while i was getting a little concerned along the approach (it is right smack dab in the middle of a fishing village, on the northern part of town), after a week i really like the location and smiling at the neighbors and meeting the children (and giving them bananas). everyone who is presently at the mother's house is over the age of 50(i think) - all very nice but all on their own programs.